Thursday, May 02, 2013

Fucked-Up Relationshit


I am at the point of hating YOU and respecting YOU at the same time.
YOU played a big role in my life, for being this person I am right now and bringing me to where I am now and I thank YOU for that.
YOU're one of the greatest mentor I've ever had and I'm one lucky bitch, indeed.
And also, I consider YOU as a friend, a friend that is always by my side to listen to my pointless dramas over and over again, a friend that offers a helping hand in everything and a shoulder to cry on, but all of that was BEFORE.
I know you know who you are and I know that YOU are no numb to not notice that I'm not the little girl I used to be. I've change a lot, I know, but YOU also played a big role to this bitch I am now.
But I'm fed up and so fcked up. Being my mentor, being YOU doesn't give YOU the right to bad mouth at me. Specially when I don't have anything to do with all the shit, ayokong-ayoko ng dinadamay ako pagka wala akong alam.
What made me really HATE(?) YOU when sent me a message that is as long as EDSA that says 'Puro kau pabigat! SALAMAT!' and another one says 'Nagpasya na ko. Di kau sumagot kaya wala akong dapat marinig na reklao mula sainyo mula ngaun. Walang samaan ng loob. Di kau marunong mag isip na oras habol natin at as inuuna pa mga sarili kesa sa kapakanan ng banda at nakararami. Kau inuuna ko kahit may gampanin ako pamilya o trabaho man. Mula ngaun, ganyan na din mentalidad na gagawin ko, tutal kau nagsimula. Kung ayaw mabara, wag na lang magsalita. Salamat.'
So here's my reaction with the first message, I didn't able to make it because I don't know that it is already the day of turnover, if only someone sent a group message informing the people concerned and hey, kung si Mr.President nga nagulat nga na nung araw (Sat) na pala na yon yung turnover eh, sabi nya sa'kin "Nagulat nga ako dumating eh tapos ngayon nga daw yung meeting, ang alam ko yung sinet ko na date bukas pa." and pabigat?! Seriously? Miminsan di nakarating, pabigat na agad? Excuse me, nahiya naman ako sa pagiging PABIGAT KO KUNO.
And to the second message I was like "The fuck! What's it this person talking about? I was clueless and dumbfounded. Nagpasya ka na kasi 'di kami sumagot; would you care to ASK first, sir? Anong sasagutin ko kung walang tanong?. At dun sa nasabi sa message na inuuna namin sarili namin kesa kapakanan ng banda, the thing that came to my mind are those who went swimming that day. Grabe, minsan lang naman yon, di naman araw-araw eh, poor guys, masama na ang magsaya eh. Question: HINDI NA BA KAI PWEDE MAGSAMA-SAMA BILANG MAGKAKAIBIGAN NA WALANG KINALAMAN SA BANDA, KAHIT MINSAN? psh.
And about YOU na kami ang inuuna kesa sa gampanin mo sa trabaho at pamilya, okay, we appreciate that, Thank You! but did we force you sir to do so? It is YOUR OWN PERSONAL DECISION so bakit nyo isinusumbat? (Oh well, isinusumbat kasi ang dating sa /kanila/ at sakin din) Do you really think that we're happy that you're wife is actually cursing us?! For Pete's sake. We don't like that, who would anyway?
*insert looonnnggg exasperated sigh here*
Those are only some of the things that made the boiling pot of water explode and now every single thing that YOU do/say, irritates me. But don't you worry, I still look up to YOU as my mentor so YOU'll still receive the respect I owe you.
I dunno what to say anymore and I dunno how to deal with this. -___________-

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